"Oi i'm not even immunised ay", said Cole after wiping away some weeping from a facial lesion.
"Kill it, kill it with fire", screamed a terrified Louise, Tristan Stark's girlfriend.
To not be outdone by NHRU News, the Griffins Gazette found a bloke named Alan Jones who drinks at the Hamilton Station Hotel to speak at their inaugural inpromptu luncheon.
The NHRU have decided to change plans last minute and provide full coverage of a Wanderers Under 9s game.
"It was the role I was born to play", said Nick Bookless upon finding out the news.
Nathan Davis is marked out for 8 weeks and requires surgery after inadvertently cutting in on the elderly at the salad buffet, it has been confirmed.
With the players taking their minds of game one, we have drawn the results of the logo competition early. Please vote for your favourite.
Despite being elected last November, President Trench also refuses to release his tax returns, it has been confirmed. The Griffins Gazette, like many of our readership believes this evidences a cover up.
‘I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done’: Jones-Hall on sex, drugs, gambling and charity scam
The Griffins Gazette Back Line Logo Competition is open for submission. Again this year, judging sadly has to be stratified in two categories, namely "penis-based" and "non-penis based". The winner of "non-penis based" earns their spot as logo for one month on the Griffins website.